Thursday, April 10, 2014

The Bet... And Just Whose Memory is it Anyway?

One of the few "vague memories" I have is of a time before my time. I suppose I could have been alive as I am now at the time, however I would have been not much older than a toddler. This is one of the few vague memories I seem to have had as Philip Dick. Obviously, they can't be my memories as I am. It must have been one of the times where I feel that somehow Phil and I co-habitated the same physical space, body in this instance. His body.

It seems I recall a time when Phil was talking to one or a few of his friends and he made a bet that he would survive physical death. I want to say that it was with fellow writers with whom he had shared this with. I have no idea what the stakes were. I just feel as if he made that "I'll be back" proclamation. 

For what it's worth, Phil won. Because somehow, he and I are the same... And, in that regard, he did survive physical death. It's difficult to explain. I don't expect many people to believe me, let alone understand me. 

If you've ever watched The Matrix, and I suspect many of you have, it is similar to a scene where I believe Neo or Mr. Smith is explaining how it was when Neo joined with Mr. Smith at the end of the first movie. To paraphrase... "It's like a part of him was grafted onto a part of me". As in "one"...

I've been wanting to write this post for a long time, but as you can imagine, I was hesitant. How in the world could I make such a grand proclamation without any evidence. If you didn't think me crazy before, surely you do now.  I was planning on some long, thoughtful post, but that time is not now. I do need to let it be known now.  I suppose, based on what I HAVE been through and faith, some may think it possible. I believe there is more that I could remember if I were to be examined and if I were to examine. I don't expect any grand homecoming or sweeping congratulations, etc. But, what's done is done, and I will find some way to prove it. 

Thursday, January 23, 2014

We'll Find a Place in Time

It's been quite some time since I've felt any kind of "special" connection with any shows, such as the previously mentioned movies and tv shows such as Alias, Battlestar Galactica, ect. It's been roughly four years since any such intuitions manifested. Over the previous 2-3 weeks I've been watching "The 4400" which involves 4400 abductees who were taken from various times in the previous century into the future. They were sent back to the early 21st century with special abilities in an effort to guide humanity in a more positive direction to avoid eventual catastrophe.

I began watching it the first time when it first came out. I believe I got through the first couple of seasons of four total. However, I'm almost certain that I didn't finish the series. But the closer to the ending I get, the more familiar it seems I am with the series. This could be something as simple as a simple error in judgement and memory on my part. However, I'm just feeling a little strange throughout this ordeal. It seems like I may have dreamed some of the scenes in the series before I had watched them. Of course, my dreams are fairly vivid and often comprise of science fiction and action/adventure/spy intrigue sort of scenarios. I wish my imagination were nearly as good as my dream world.

At the moment I've decided to go through a period of sleep deprivation in an attempt to induce vivid and creative hypnogonic type thoughts. I am now near the 41st hour of sleeplessness. So far, I am actually feeling quite lucid and together. To note: I began having these feelings and intuitions long before I began the sleeplessness cycle. Once I am well rested I'll try not to wait so long to give a more detailed summary of my thoughts on this matter.

Monday, December 23, 2013

A New Mind of Old?

The/my writing that I seem to remember from the mid 1980's was very much like the pulp science fiction of the mid century. In some fantastical way it was that very same pulp fiction (at least if I am factually accurate in my co-creation of PKD's works, but alas, we will probably never know). It will always be an instinctual thing, a gut feeling. A divine knowledge. The writing seems to me equivalent to the mind of a teenager, one somewhat in tune with the times. My mind. Almost immature to be sure. Like a child's active imagination. If I did indeed find some way (insert myriad methods here) to help Phil create those stories then what is the equivalent today? The stories I am creating and will create are to be fashioned after what likeness? All I can do is to try to sell them in today's market, this present world, because I have no idea if/when some remnants of these stories will be ferried off to a distant universe or the past or wherever or whenever they are destined to go. Are they to be literary in nature? There really is no decent paying market for pulp fiction anymore. Anyway, I have evolved since my time as a teenager. Not always for the better, but evolved nevertheless. I am both more sophisticated and more tortured. I'm not sure I'm up to the task of literary writing. I'm more of an ideas person, as you can imagine. And I feel my ideas and execution must be perfect. It's this kind of rut and obsession in my thinking that keep me from being productive. I just don't know what to expect of myself. Perhaps it is someone else's turn to mystically help me. Universe... Pay if forward.

No answer...

As I thought...

I am my own and on my own I will.

Saturday, November 23, 2013

A Course Correction

A course correction... is it longstanding this time? Is it merely my way of not committing to a timeline? A goal finally reached?

Once again, I am shifting direction and will begin working on my autobiographical science fiction novel. It will most likely be the same name or one similar to that of the memoir I've been working on, Alienus Tempus. 

Sometimes I feel that I really do need to get my story out, in all it's unbelievable details and facts, and my interpretation of those events. However, I'm just not sure it's the appropriate time.  My Heart and Will is continuously drawn to the fiction. I have many different projects I've worked on over the last 11 years. My mind keeps wandering to the playground of the imagined. It's where I can be most creative and concerning the autobiographical novel, I can fictionalize my experiences and if/when it gets to the public then they can interpret it as they wish. It is this way in which I can also cloak the truth of my experiences, or at least my truth. It is also the way in which I can endlessly pontificate and play with those scenarios and possibilities without having to say "This is it!". Will I ever reach a penultimate truth? Not sure... not sure that it is even possible. In fact, I'm not sure if I even want it to be possible. So now that you know my MO, be aware that it could change at any time. 

Thursday, October 31, 2013

Where's the Hum?

I've yet to update on the two dreams (one of which I had forgotten about) involving President Obama. But that will come soon.

Of note, however, is the fact that I haven't felt or heard "the Hum" in nearly 7 or 8 weeks. I am currently staying at the Salvation Army in Modesto (most likely not for much longer). It's a building that used to be a nut factory/warehouse (oh, the irony). It's a very large rectangular body, of the kind in which I would most usually able hear the hum. It's rather disturbing to me. I feel as if something may be wrong, or that I am on the wrong path. I'm in the veteran's homeless program and I can stay here up to two years, however, there are more cons than pros for me staying here. Not to mention that they take 30% of my income. I'm very restricted and it's decreasing the feeling of freedom that I had felt before coming here. Yeah, living in my car has it's disadvantages, but being trapped in my efficiency apartment in Pennsylvania (even though I had no restrictions) and then feeling trapped here has reaffirmed that I need to be mobile once again. I was hanging out in Santa Cruz before a severe toothache and infection brought me to the SA shelter. A relative of mine volunteers here (he himself having gone through the civilian program) and he told my mom who in turn told me about the program. This place is beginning to suck my soul just as Pennsylvania did.

I'm not saying it's a bad program, it's just not for me. The fact that I am unable to perceive the Hum is definitely a concern of mine. It may be nothing, but I'd still like to know what will happen when I leave.

Sunday, September 22, 2013

Am I Excluded from The Human Touch?

Here I am, using my Blogger iPhone app to make a post. Haha! And it takes the heartbreak of a woman to get me to post. Despite the most recent dream involving the President Obama and the presidency in general (about 3 weeks ago) I post because alas, I am lonely. 

I have important things to do (potentially of the most important kind) and yet I'm paralyzed of moving on because I'm just looking for a little bit of that human touch as Bruce Springsteen so delicately touches us with. 

I'd like a relationship but sometimes I just want to play, with as many women as possible. But so many near misses. What is going wrong? Universe? Do you want my help? Tit for Tat!!! I'm going to start calling you on it. The Universe entity I'm referring to is in the guise of many. Separate Universes. The Universe, gods and goddesses, ET's, governments, our own US government. Come on... You have intelligence and spies. Dress someone up and send her my way. Let's have a play date, shall we? Keep me occupied for a while. Then perhaps I can do what I need to do. Even I need to see my wild oats ;-)


Wednesday, July 17, 2013

To Whom can I Request Asylum?

If there were such an agency, terrestrial or not, would I even want to? Hell, I can't even be sure the agency(s) to which I would apply to aren't the ones actually interfering with my well being.

However, that being said, I wonder if the intelligence leaker Snowden will be granted asylum by Russia? I don't know enough about the situation to say much, other than I wonder if they would grant me asylum? Perhaps they could get their psychic program afloat again. Haha! Maybe, they are the ones interfering with me and not my own US government. And if not my own government, then who the hell am I seeking asylum from?

Perhaps the world governments should be a little more concerned with all that I have revealed in my short time. There is much, much more. The sooner the better for the planet, humans included. I know certain factions are monitoring my ramblings, and you should really contact me in an official capacity. I really do want to help.

Saturday, July 6, 2013

Where am I Going? Where have I Been?

I'm about to visit the Land of some very special People.I feel like I'm supposed to. One of the many suppose to's. I attempted this nearly four years ago and thought about it again two and a half years ago. I couldn't go through with it. It's not that I didn't want to, but I was afraid to. Would my life change once I went. Would my Destiny Manifest, or would it be all for naught? Perhaps neither. Just another step along the Path. Albeit a very, very important one. I'm not sure how they will receive me, if they will receive me. Will they know me? Do I know me? Will they remind me? Perhaps I don't want to know who I am, or was, and it's that reluctance that repels me from a Most Honorable People. Perhaps it will be for me and me alone.

Places shouldn't matter. I am Everywhere, and I am Nowhere. It's the Human Spirit and their respect for their Home that makes the Land Sacred.

Don't be led astray. Incorporate, but don't be enveloped. Stand Fast!

PJP

Thursday, June 13, 2013

Free at Last

Despite being homeless in a state far away from where I previously had a home, I couldn't feel more free than I do at the moment. Living sequestered in that apartment in Pennsylvania was destroying my heart and soul. I was almost literally trapped in my apartment. I am camping on Federal lands inexpensively (cheaper than rent). I'll be in the Taos,  New Mexico area for quite some time and have even submitted my resume for a position in the lab at one of a nearby hospital. In a way, I'm not sure if I want to stop camping, living in car, whatever. I feel so free and unbound, and I can carry on with my work (writing, learning, teaching, playing, etc.). I am tempted by the stability of a full time job, in addition to being able to date with money in my pocket. A part of me screams, NO! It's not time yet. My "camping" journey has just begun and Taos is but one of many brief respites along the way. Not sure what I will do but I know I am truly living in the moment as much as I can.

Sunday, April 28, 2013

Searching for Fragments of My Consciousness

I'm in the beginning stages of undergoing a new journey. Although I'll be mobile, it's one of a deep, personal - dare I say, Transcendent nature.

I'm not sure how long this will last. Our journeys last a lifetime, though there are mini quests to experience along the way. Sometimes they are detours, but all are still part of The Individual Path.

Logistically, my resources are limited. However, I'm at the point where that will not stop me. I'm prepared to even be homeless (in fact, that's probably meant to be part of the path).

I won't stop until I've found what I'm looking for.

Sunday, March 10, 2013

Sacrifice

Sometimes... the many sacrifices seem too much to bear. Then, I look all around time and I realize this is me. It has to be done.

There may be no silver light at the end of the tunnel. No respite, even while here.

I suppose that's why it's called Sacrifice.

Monday, February 4, 2013

Interference

Interference - It's what you do, and you know the you of whom I am referring to

I am telling you that is needs to cease soon, for you will not have to find me... I will find you


Phoenix Janus Pax

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Babylon 5 ate my NaNoWriMo

The first week of NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) is coming to a close and I've barely written 1300 words of the 50,000 that I need.

Blame it on Babylon 5

I've been watching the shows for about 3-4 weeks now and am near the finish line. Like all good stories, this too, must come to an end (at least for now).

Something quite unexpected but not totally surprising has occurred whilst watching B5. I had yet another uncanny experience of being "aware" of a few aspects of the show. The show first aired on TV in 1994, and lasted for 5 seasons. I'm sure I've been aware of its status (or that it existed) before, but I don't believe I've ever watched an episode. However, I began having "awareness issues" concerning Ambassador Kosh, from Vorlon, not long after I was first made "currently" aware by watching the series in "real-time" (i.e. 3-4 weeks ago). It just seems that everything about him/it was familiar in a far distant kind of way. I did not experience deja vu nor do I believe I have watched this series before (certainly not enough to be experiencing this level of awareness).

The only other long instant of awareness had occurred during the situation with the Babylon 5 Security Chief Michael Garibaldi, particularly the who situation when he disappears, is taken aboard a Shadow ship, and is ultimately mind-fucked by the Psi-Corps. The Psi-Corps manipulated him ever so slightly but still enough to make him (Garibaldi) think he was in control of his own will, but in fact was not fully. 

Vorlons (beings of light), Garibaldi (not himself)... I can't imagine what these things have in common with me ;-)

That being said... I may dig into it at some point in the future. It's not like I don't have enough to think about already. But, that's the thing, one would think with OCD and ADD, I would have enough to think about.

The Universe can be a Sick Joke...


Oh well... Back to NaNoWriMo


Expect a form of Analysis in future stories (hopefully sold stories).



Monday, October 1, 2012

A Hum Conundrum

I'm back... at least for a bit.

After several months of not hearing or feeling "the hum", I have felt/heard it over the past few weeks. Not consistently, just here and there.

I "water fasted" last week for the first time. My goal was to make it 48 hours and I succeeded. I'll go into that in more depth on another post. I'm currently fasting again. I began at 7:10 pm on Saturday 9/29/2012. I hope to go at least 72 hours this time.

I slept most of Sunday, waking up occasionally. Sometime around 7 pm I heard and felt that pulsating frequency I refer to as "the hum". I heard it again around 5 hours later. Having slept all day Sunday, I am now awake and hopefully will stay awake.

I live in a large house/building with several apartments, therefor I can not guarantee that the hum is not being emitted from some device in one of those apartments. I'm sure it's nothing in mine. There is no one living upstairs.

During this fast, I hope to meditate more and reflect on everything that's happened. If it is truly "the hum", perhaps I'll experience it more as I try to get "in tune" with our home.

Friday, November 11, 2011

Frank Bertrand writings about PKD on Scribd

Frank Bertrand has been a Philip Dick fan since probably before I was born. In the 70's and 80's he conducted several interviews with Phil, and has written extensively about him since Phil's death.

I read a few of his articles when I first had the "PKD connection" on 6-23-2002. I'll be rereading those articles and even more for the first time.

His writings can be found here at Scribd

I've got a lot of rereading to do so I can complete this memoir. I'm looking forward to it.

Thank you, Frank, for all the time and hard work you have put in for the PKD community.

Monday, November 7, 2011

My Memoir Kickstarter Project Launched

I've officially launched my Kickstarter project today. Kickstarter is a fundraising site for creative projects. In this model, one launches a project and sets a deadline to meet their funding goal (1-60 days). If the funding is not met then the project will not be funded. It is an all-or-nothing situation.  Rewards (usually in the form of the finished product, e.g. books, CD's, DVD's, ect.  The more you donate, the better the rewards. Also rewarding, is knowing that you will help someone fulfill one of their dreams, that they may not have been able to do otherwise.

My memoir, called Alienus Tempus, concerns how I manage mental illness and common and not-so common philosophical inquiries while trying to explain mysterious and remarkable events that concern the late science fiction writer, Philip K Dick.

If you happen to read this post, please take a look at my project even if you decide not to donate. That's okay... just so you know that one day this memoir will be available to everyone at no cost.  I want to get this story out. It's my dharma.

Monday, July 4, 2011

Waiting on Rights

I have a short story that follows closely my situation with PKD. It's a very condensed version, but it needs to be told before I can continue with any other work. This is the thorn in my foot that needs to be removed. I'm now waiting on The Estate (of PKD) to decide whether or not I can publish a portion of text from Phil's Exegesis Essa:

"The Ultra Hidden (Cryptic) Doctrine: The Secret Meaning of the Great System of Theosophany of the World, Openly Revealed for the First Time (March 2, 1980)"

The story won't work without it, so if I have to paraphrase it, I will do so. Let's hope for an optimal outcome.

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

New Blog Series by Charles Q. Choi from Scientific American

I discovered this new blog series from a post at Mindhacks

The very first post is here where Charles Choi describes the purpose of his new blog series. It is a blog about discussing with scientists questions that may science may be impossible to answer. Sounds like a winner!

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Penn Writers

Not too long ago, I registered and paid for a membership with Pennwriters.org.
This has saved me the same amount on an upcoming writers conference in Pittsburgh, PA in May. I'm also attending a pre-conference seminar the day before the conference begins.

This will be my first writing conference I will have attended. I'm looking forward to it, and plan to have my novel's first draft completed and a query letter and synopsis ready should I get the chance to perform an elevator pitch.  

Sunday, February 27, 2011

Robot questions its own existence?

This is an exciting piece from Scientific American. Be sure to check out the video. This is the stuff of what good science fiction is made. Hard scifi, the kind where you create characters that are trying to reach an objective and you show your readers how it came about.

Be sure to watch the video of the robot trying to walk/crawl

Sunday, February 13, 2011

I'm Writing my Novel in 30 Days

Not too long ago, I bought a Writer's Digest Special Edition, "Write Your Novel In 30 Days". I am reading through the meat of the "how to's" and have officially begun this day. I've had much of the first couple of days already finished - like, 5 years ago.

However, I am going to stick closely with the suggested calendar. I've already got more than 10 key scenes, but most of them are in the Beginning. I need to create more for the Middle and the Ending.

I've been up all night thinking about it, so I've decided This Is THE Day to begin.

Thursday, February 10, 2011

How much information is there in the world?

ScienceDaily (2011-02-10) -- Think you're overloaded with information? Not even close. A new study calculates how much information humankind can handle.


http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2011/02/110210141219.htm#

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Waking in two places at once

I had an interesting experience Sunday Morning as I lay in bed resonating in and out of sleep.
I would wake up to reality (while laying on belly) and open my eyes, see whatever was really there, and then as soon as I closed my eyes I would see another scene. This scene was a still picture scene (not a moving dream). It's like I was waking up to a different location (in space and/or time). Then I would open my eyes, see what was really in my room, then I would close my eyes and it's like I was seeing a new scene plastered to the inside of my eyelids. Very surreal.

Monday, January 17, 2011

I can't Read!!!

I've been having this obsession for about 4-5 months now, that I will lose the ability to read, and I tell myself over and over again (in my head) that I can't read.

I'm a writer; how can I write if I can not read. See the predicament I've made for myself.

I'm also upset that I can't be everywhere at once and am not able to literally see things from another persons eyes. How fracked up am I? I ruminate over this and other existential/philosophical questions. Arrgghhh!!!

I have a two page list of Obsessions somewhere. I'll have to find it and post it.

Depersonalization Disorder doesn't make things any easier.

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Story - "Regolith Obessions"

This is a story I first wrote about 5 or 6 years ago. Mostly untouched since then. A little rusty. Hope someone likes it.



Jesse kneeled next to the portable one piece oxygen generator, repositioned the catalyst for the eighth time within the preceeding thirty minutes. Once finished, he stood up with the pack in hand ready to hoist it onto his back, then took it off and set it aside, only to tear into it again.

Melony, his wife and Mars native along with his Earth born sister, Jackie, were sitting in the kitchen drinking coffee and nibbling at toast beneath the skylight revealing a rusty Martian skyline.

They peered compassionately into Jesse’s labroom as he worked heavily at his gear.

Shifting her gaze from Melony to Jesse and back to Melony, Jackie whispered, “How bad is it now?”

“It’s worse,” Melony complained. She pulled the coaster closer to her and sat her cup down. “Last night he checked the alarm … let’s just say I lost count after twenty. And this morning, he switched the computer on and off at least ten times. He said the settings didn’t seem right and if he rebooted, the system would run better. He’s less convinced every day.”

“Oh … I didn’t realize it was that bad.” Jackie squinted and dabbed at the corner of her mouth with a napkin. “Is it like this everyday?”

Melany nodded. “It’s so difficult to watch him. I feel so bad, and there’s nothing I can do to help. For nearly six months now, we’ve had to deal with this. He’s been completely out of Stabil for a month now.” She slammed her fists onto the table. “Those damned Terrasolus. If they don’t want to colonize other worlds why don’t they just stay on Earth and leave those of us who do alone?”

Jackie nodded in agreement. “Dan tells me that the Marsguard may soon reach an agreement with the Terrasolus. Maybe soon they’ll let at least one of the supply shuttles land.”

Melony’s eyes widened. “Really? That’s such good news. If he can keep it together just a little while longer, we’ll be OK. If he gets any worse, I’m afraid he may not be able to meet the Quota. I don’t know what he’d do without his work.”

Jess entered the kitchen wearing Mars atmospheric garment, his oxygen tubes draped over the front of his left shoulder. His dark hair dangled over his deep set eyes and weathered face. He blinked hard five times and then furiously rubbed his eyes.
“Okay, Hun,” he sighed, “I guess I’ll be on my way now.” He bent over and kissed his wife firmly on the lips and then glanced at his sister. “I’ll see you later, Jackie. If you’re still here when I get back.”

Jackie smiled at him and said, “Okay, Jesse. Take it easy.”

“I’ll call you between classes,” Melany called out as he left the living quarters and entered the gas exchanger module.

Descending from the hazy sky in his rotacar, Jesse looked out at the freshly dug land and gasped. He had removed far more of the Martian regolith than he had realized or had ever intended.

At testing site sector BE31, about 40 miles south of the Zephyria Plains Volcano there was supposed to have been twenty, two meter squared, one half meter deep sections of dug soil. What there was, however, was a continous levy of martian soil, totally upheaveled bordering the edges of a hole the size of a Terran city block.

Taken aback, he frowned, shook his head and said, “What a damned waste of time and resources. I should just stop while I’m ahead. Just move on. Not that hard to do. Why can’t I? Just do the required amount … a good representative sample and then stop. That’s it.”

At the landing pad, Jesse hopped out of the rotacar, his boots crunching through a few millimeters of the permafrost that surrounded the dig for hundreds of miles. From the storage trunk he retrieved his field equipment, which consisted of various spectrophotometers, field scopes, collection devises and microbial culture media and loaded them onto the remote Intellirove.

High above him, a circling 3D phrase that read “Must we destroy Mars, too?” projected from a distant location he could not directly see.

“Marskeepers,” he sighed. “I applaud their idealism, but their missing a little on the practical side. Don’t they realize that we have to get off Earth, sometime. And to do that, we must make other worlds more like Earth. Survival 101.”

After about three hours of digging, sampling, and culturing he sat down next to the hole and refreshed himself with water and a fieldbar. He scooped up a handful of Martian soil, crumbled it, and let it filter through his fingers.

“I wonder what it is?” he thought.

Most soil scientists don’t sample and test soil deeper than two feet on Mars, because that is where the bacteria and fungi had been seeded in hope that they could eventually add grassy plants.

Jesse, on the other hand, had the obsessive thought that the Terrasolus seeded the soil with terrestrial invertebrates from Earth, which he knew was nonsense since there still wasn’t enough atmospheric oxygen in the air or soil for them to survive. But, Jesse grew up on Earth and studied terrestrial vertebrate biology. He knew them well. He could not escape that transfixing thought, therefore he dug further, until a random sampling area was no longer much of a random area but a complete perimeter exposure. He hardly ever dug below two feet, but a few days ago he had done just that and a subsequent microscopic analysis of the material had revealed tiny spheroids about ten micrometers in diameter. Since, he’d been scooping away just past that two feet point on all areas he had formerly dug.

A rotacar beat its’ way through the air splaying Martian dust in its wake. It eased onto the sand next to his. The sun glared down on Jesse’s eyes as he squinted to try to make out who was traveling toward him. Jess noticed the red “Marsgaurd” logo against the green-blue background of the security vehicle.

To his surprise, his brother-in-law, Dan, climbed out of his rotacar and approached him.

Jesse stood up, shook the sand and soil from his pants and extended his hand. “Dan, I thought you weren’t coming with Jackie this time.”

Dan shook Jesse’s outstretched hand and replied, “Hey, Jesse. I wasn’t planning on it, but ah … something’s come up. Something that I need to check out personally.”
Dan nodded toward the East, “So, how long have they been airing their propaganda?”

“Well,” Jesse shrugged. “It used to be random out here but now it stays on any time someone is in the vicinity. I guess a motion detector must trip the power to the holograph projector. Maybe it’s infrared. I don’t know. It’ll go off soon. Legally they can’t air longer than one minute, once per hour per 100 miles. Anyway…” He crossed his arms and leaned against the field cart. “So, why are you here? Wait… wait… Has the terraform committee sent you here to check up on me?”

“No, Jesse,” Dan rebutted, shifting his weight in the sand. “Why would you say that? Wait…I haven’t said anything to anybody. Nobody outside the family should even know. You know that. We’ve done well at keeping that in the family. It’s nobody else’s damned business, as far as I’m concerned.”

“Well, something’s bothering you; what is it? Tell me what’s on your mind.”

“Look, Jesse. The Guard HQ has just found evidence that a few of the more extremist Terrasolus may have seeded damn near the whole planet with some kind of microscopic toxin. Apparently, it was incorporated with the last bacterial spray over fifty years ago. It was incorporated into a radioactive timing device. Once the target time occurs the toxins will be released. We don’t know what the toxin can do. We can only speculate. We’re trying to gather more information, and have assembled a think-tank to determine if anything can be done.”

Jess stood motionless, suspended in disbelief, then kicked a couple of pebbles into the hole he had just dug.

With his hands on his hips, he slowly turned away from Dan and hung his head low, straining to hold back tears of frustration. He knew this was major, yet his own battle crept in. How could he help in this time of need, in his ridiculous condition?

“Unbelievable,” he mumbled while turning to face Dan. “Well, I guess this supercedes my medication problem, huh?”

“We’re hoping that they didn’t go as far as that, and this is just a little scare and that’s it. Just keep a close watch for anything peculiar, OK? I have to get back to regional HQ, got a lot of people to talk to.”

Dan turned and began walking toward his rotacar, when Jesse ran up to him and gasping for breath said, “Wait, Dan. I have something to show you.”

The Hum - West Coast

The Hum had manifested itself to me on two occasions on the West Coast.

The first time was when I was staying with a hostess from couchsurfing.com near Monterey, CA. Each morning as I woke and all was quiet, I could hear that faint hum, like a gigantic engine from a distance.

The second "session" was the two days I spent at the USA Hostel in Hollywood. Each morning when everything most all was quiet, that faint electric pulsating hum could be heard prominently.

Spaceship Earth! LOL

Monday, January 3, 2011

The Walk

I have some unfortunate news to share with any who were following my walking blog. Because of medical issues with my right foot arch (Plantar Fasciitis) and previous ankle injuries included a fracture in my right ankle, I am unable to continue to walk.

The situation in which we must find a ride to the place we last ended our walk is a difficult and unpredictable one, which will conclude in a much longer walk than anticipated and difficulty in trying to find parking spots. However, I believe that I could work with that, but the injuries to my right foot and right ankle have proven to be not be fixable at the time.

I feel much regret and felt like forces beyond my control were at work. Although there is no blame. That's just the way things are at the moment. Perhaps, when my daughter has gone off to college and if I correct the medical condition and finances permit, I will attempt this walk at that time.

I like this insight from Viktor Frankl -

Forces beyond your control can take away everything you possess except one thing, your freedom to chose how you will respond to the situation. You cannot control what happens in your life, but you can always control what you will feel and do about what happens to you.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Taos, NM and the Hum

I'm currently on the road (in my car, not on foot). I'm currently in Taos, NM - home of many important cultural and art museums. Many creative types - artists, writers, painters, etc, have made Taos, New Mexico their home.

I really wanted to investigate (albeit a short lived investigation) the "hum" and possibly experience it. I've heard the hum in two places just north of Pittsburgh when I lived their. However, a significant portion of Taos, NM (at least 10%) "hears" the hum.

Here is my original post about the hum when I first heard it in Butler, PA.

Sure enough, when thing were quite in my hotel room this morning, upon awakening I could hear that faint hum that sounds like an 18-wheeler from a distance.

Yesterday, on highway 64, just east of Taos, I got out to take some pictures and when I turned the car off, I thought perhaps I didn't because I could steel feel the "hum" of the car. It wasn't sound as much as vibration. And later, at the Taos visitor center, I asked a lady about it and she verified that people say the focal point is about 10 miles east of Taos. I found that after the fact of my experiencing it myself.

Very interesting.

Monday, November 1, 2010

A Walk Revisited

It turns out that fate has dealt me a little money to begin my Walk after all. Not much, but it is a start. This time, because of impending Winter, I plan to visit family in Modesto California for a few days, and from their walk to Point Reyes Station, and from their through San Francisco and following highway 1 to Los Angeles. From LA I will begin traveling East into our Country's interior.